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"How To Get Kicked Out of Your Gym in 10 Days or Less"

Day 1. Bring your own music - use a boom box - and turn it up to inspiration levels, LOUD. Some Pantera, NIN, Metallica or GNR should do the trick.

Day 2. Set up a circuit like one of the typical CrossFit "Workouts of the Day" and put a sign up at each station advising others that the equipment is reserved for accurate timing of your efforts.

Day 3. While practicing the Olympic lifts, drop a max load from overhead. This may do it right here.

Day 4. Find a 20-24 inch platform and perform box jumps. Try three sets of two minutes of max jumps. Bizarrely, this one irks the crap out of most gym management.

Day 5. Take a pair of dumbells out into the parking lot to do walking lunges. WARNING, You may be accused of theft.

Day 6. Load up the bar (with the bumpers they don't have) to do some heavy deadlifts. Don't forget to grunt, scream, and use chalk.

Day 7. If the gym has support poles, climb them. If not, find something to climb; sling a rope over a beam or rafters, attach some climbing holds to the wall and use them. You won't get to the climbing part if you need to attach anything. You may get stopped at the door coming in with a 25 ft. coil of 2 inch rope.

Day 8. Workout with your shirt off. and when you're done lay sweaty and shirtless on the ground in an attempt to recover. They've probably never seen a "sweat angel".

Day 9. Walk on your hands, or do handstand push-ups or some other basic gymnastics stuff.

Day 10. If you've gotten this far, this one is the clencher. Record your efforts by writing them on the wall.

If after day 10 you are still allowed in, you belong to a great gym. If you're asked to leave before or during this experiment, FIND A NEW ONE.

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I ran across this somewhere recently while drinking some Crossfit Kook-Aid (made a couple minor changes). It's funny, and at the same time it reminds us of how lucky we are to be able to do the things we do in the spaces we have access to.

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